“For the intellectual with a conscience, it is easy to become a ‘trusted soldier of the revolution.’ Once he is incorporated and a functionary of the quasi-religious brotherhood, he lives in what seemed to be an elevated world. The rules are strict. It takes a long time to be detached enough to see whom you are serving. And then it takes more courage to break than it takes to join. The step to renounce the brotherhood of men that believed they are working for a better life for all, to divorce yourself from the pioneering of mankind, from the fighters for a great cause, is very difficult. To leave the warmth, the safety and friendship that have been given you is a tragedy. You have been imbued with the Communist spirit to such an extent that for a long time you see yourself as a traitor, as do the comrades you have left. How you dislike yourself! You go into loneliness, you hide. Slowly you recover, as from an illness. Once you have recovered, you know that you must expose the Communist conspiracy.”
—Hede Massing, This Deception. New York: Duell, Sloan and Pearce, 1951, p. 335.